sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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