God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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