"it" just moved
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
