Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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