what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
