suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
