yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
