Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
