My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
