I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
