No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
