i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
40s are totally the cure
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
