Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
oh god the rape fog is back!
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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