Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
