Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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