Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
