your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
