you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
