Kiss
Puke
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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