I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
