At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
