I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
