is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
