Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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