she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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