And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
