We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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