You really coming over, don't trick.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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