Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
