I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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