he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
tequila makes me forget i have legs
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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