Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
