a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
