no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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