I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
