Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
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