Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
