remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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