Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
