why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
