is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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