Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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