i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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