idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
