Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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