the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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