I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
