Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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