I want to stick my p in your. b.
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
