Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
